cobraconvert

hi group, my friend at work showed me you all's site,and this thread of "ex-depression" .. i too have a sad story and hope i feel better when i share it.. well it all started off after high school.. I knew of this chick,but never dated.it was by chance we bumped into each other started talking and hanging out,we clicked no lies,life was good.. she was and still is the perfect girl..we had joy..we had fun...seasons in the sun...until....i left for the navy...before i left she was hinting around buying a place,marriege,kids..so since we both felt the same way..i proprosed..hired a jazz band(my buddy) in the small park in our small town..it was great..then i met her friends..these are all girls i knew in high school as well...we go down hill from here .why people get jealous of other peoples happiness i shall never know..but things started going wrong when her friends started taking her out when i left for the navy and started talking crap behind my back, i have always been a honest stand up guy..and she knew this..but she continued to be friends with them ... well 1 .5 years into the navy.i was involved in a submarine accedent causing injury in my knees.
i was layed up in a navy hospital for 2 months,pending inquery.. well anyhoot i wrote one letter and she traked me down and stayed with me all through that ordeal..and she told me what her friends were saying..and i assured her.that her frineds were just playing high school games..i was later released and we went back home..which now all of a sudden her church was telling me i couldnt marry her do to the our difference in religion.. so i go school to get a job..well after all that her church says we couldnt get married after i ve done just about everything for this girl....GOD himself says i cant marry her...to make matters worse she after to weeks of "alone time" she calls me up on x-mas day!!! and breaks up with me...a year later i found out she is getting married because she got knocked up from a guy in her church...who is later trown in jail after stealing her money theated her dad,abuses her and kid...on top of all that doing and selling drugs...this is the guy that her church said they could marry...after he went to jail..she had it rough...she called me up and asked me for help..i didnt know what to say..so i told her there was nothing i could do for her and she she chose this..it felt so bad not taking her back...well that night she decided it was all to much..i ve tried to blame myself for all this..i might have been the last person she talked to..since then i try very hard to listen to people and work out disagree ments..and i developed a shyness towards women... love hurts us the most i guess... im getting better,life is on the up and up..so..who knows...
the grinch

NYT-OWL

Damn Fred! That does suck! You can't blame yourself though.

dazygirl415

God only wants the best for all of us Cobra and sometimes the church can get in the way and twist God's words so that they say what they want them to say.

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. You'll always find people willing to listen here.
Women can be very insecure. You should know it was nothing you did to cause the situation. Please don't blame yourself.

On a side note, thank you for serving our country. I'm sorry you got hurt in the process but I'm glad you're healthy.

Ajax

*fires his secretary.. and gets bitten for doing so*
ok.. now that takes care of that.

Cobra,
as far as your ex goes, you did the right thing. I'm sorry that you feel that you're to blame for the outcome, but you're not. It's sad to see what extent people will go to just because they make mistakes. Your ex obviously was not right for you, and whether it has anything to do with church or god, it doesn't matter.
I'll tell you, it could've been worse. You could've taken her back and bent over backwards to help her, but where would you be now? You'd probably be in a situation where you were unhappy, with a woman who has a child that is not yours (which isn't always a bad thing), but with a woman you cannot obviously say can act responsibly when it comes to making important decisions in life.
Yes, it's harsh, but i've been through a mess like this before and it's just what happens. I took a girl back once, and it just ended up worse for me in the end. What happenned afterwards was probably the worst back stabbing I have ever encountered and it took YEARS to recover from.
Take things one day at a time and just keep on going. Be responsible for the decisions you make and always stick up for yourself. Make sure you're not bending over backwards for anyone who is not willing to do the same for you.

NYT-OWL

I was just talking to Cobra (Fred, we work together) It turns out that the church was a new church and they really shouldn't have tried to take over her life like that. He was indead the last person that she had talked to. I also told him of my most recent situation. He normally belongs to the dfwstang forum (Mustang Cobra Convtertible), but I told him to check out our forum and he said this was much better. We talk about more "life" situations than just car talk. He's also looking to get out more, so I told him to join us for Tuesday night at rack daddy's. It's not as easy to see how much pain someone has by reading stories, but when he told me, I could tell that he's still hurting from it. Some scars just never heal.

cobraconvert

it does feel really good to share this story..i dont blame myselfanymore about what happend,,and i guess i even forgave god...there are times i feel bad.. but then again i am getting over it...its all about time..and mostly i dont everwant to hurt that bad again...or be that close to anyone again ..thanks everyone*

NYT-OWL

Ok, I wrote this the other night and maybe some of you can use it and maybe some of you can't. If you can relate I hope this helps, if you can't relate then I'm happy for you. I'm not asking for feedback or anything, it's just something I wrote. (BTW Fred, better not tell anyone at work I wrote this).

Scars...
There are two different scars…..
The scars of the heart that do not heal.
You can not touch them, you can not feel.
These scars run deep inside of me.
Hidden away for none to see.
My heart does break, this pain is real.
Emotional strain, too hard to deal.

Scars of the flesh, I freely make.
For this is the pain that I can take.
This is the pain that will subside.
Easier to deal with than the pain inside.
For each new cut fulfills it’s part.
Of hiding the scars that’s on my heart.
-brian

jenkins-crew

pretty good man, I think just about everyone can relate to that.

ALWAZL8

Most definitely.....

dazygirl415

New Rant: I HATE SCHOOL! I've been spending all of my free time reading boring-*** books for this stupid class and I hibernated for a week (while the weather was beautiful might I add) working on my mid-term and a project outline in which NO guidance was given regarding what the professor was looking for. I got my grades today: 66%!!! Can you believe it! He said I "did not understand the course theories" when in a previous summary I had submitted he said "you seem to understand the course theories well, this will help you on the mid-term." IDIOT! Now I have to suck up and ask for "a chance to convey my understanding of the course material" just so I can pass! This is retarded. I was done two years ago. Why did I go back?

weininaustin

Dazy, where are you going for grad school, what program? I was going to start at St. Eds in Austin in the Summer, but now that I'm up here, I need to look into an alternative, but also want to avoid nimrods like that.

dazygirl415

Michigan State University, an online Criminal Justice Management program.

jenkins-crew

I hate stupid people....."why won't it save to my floppy drive" uh, it helps to put one in. DUUUUHHHH!!!!!!!!!

dazygirl415

:D lol

We have people who come around our area and say, "I'm here for a meeting..." I'm like, "So what?" Like I'm supposed to read their minds and tell them where they're supposed to be! There's over 10,000 people in this place with meetings happening all day everyday in every conference room and I have no idea who most of these people are. How am I supposed to know what the hell they're talking about? Geez!

NYT-OWL

I had this girl at work one time offer to give me a box of floppies because they were the wrong size. I was thinking, they only have two sizes. She brought me the box of floppies and they where the 1.44 so, after finding out that her computer wasn't old enough to use the other size floppy I ask her what was wrong with these. She said they were too long. It turns out that she was trying to put them in backwards. Another example of women and electronics.

weininaustin

Well N-O, you should really watch what you say about women. Not all are like that. I'm a Sr. Software Consultant/Developer and I come from a long line of very talented women when it comes to the math and sciences.

dazygirl415

My minor was math...

garlandrx

im here to jack you.....

NYT-OWL

Fourth...Look here blonde crazy girl with wierd glasses and tongue piercing, you are not jacking this thread.

garlandrx

yeah i am and my hair is BLACK NOW! keep up foolio!

garlandrx

you cant unjack a thread.. ill start talking about tounge piercings and ***** and stuff!

NYT-OWL

I'm listening

jenkins-crew

***** are good :D

garlandrx

*evil laugh* hahahaha i knew you wouldnt want the thread back

NYT-OWL

Ok, lastest Rant.... My ex-wife's lawyer sent a letter to my employer asking them to start withholding my child support payments from my check. The reason that she waited over a year to submit the letter is because when I went to working days I took a pay cut of about $10K a year which means that when we go to mediation on April 26th my child support payments will get reduced. She knows that it will take my employer a couple of pay periods to make the reduction and therefore my ex will be able to get a couple of extra hundred dollars off me. It's just another way for those two ****** to extort more money from me. _Back on Ranting.